Finding the Why - an Update on My 5-year Journal
This isn’t even a fraction of my sticker hoard.
I have a confession to make. Until a few days ago, I hadn’t touched my 5-Year A6 Hobonichi since April 20th. And, ultimately, I haven’t been very dedicated to it since October/November of last year. At the end of 2024 I did a massive catch-up attempt so that I would still have something on each day.
Despite this, I’m reluctant to abandon it because I love the idea behind keeping a multi-year journal. It’s such a fun concept to open each day and see what came the year before. Even just observing simple seasonalities like what ink colors I may have had in my pens, or what pen I was using. I absolutely adore the glimpses other journalers share of their own chunky books. I know mine can be a special little record of the transformation I am working on right now. I plan to be in a much different (and hopefully better) place by the time I close my five-year out in 2028. Even now, only being on the second year of the book, it’s interesting to see who I was last year and was compelled to write about. I want to keep it going.
The only trouble was that I didn’t know what to do with the more than 45 days where I hadn’t written a single thing. It’s not even all that different than where I was last year in regards to this book. What I was doing wasn’t motivating me to engage with this notebook. It was duplicating systems I already had in place and, frankly, I got bored just rehashing information that I’d already managed in my calendar or daily journal. I was frustrated because I was trying too hard to force it to work. It was a chore to make up a day that I’d missed when I was trying to record temperature, weather, and activities.
It’s really nice to see what inks I was using last year vs. this year. I was super into FWP Brilliant Beanstalk it seems in 2024, I certainly used it in quite a few entries. Gray ink is Diamine Tundra for the 2025 entry.
Despite my intentions I didn’t always remember to write it down. If I forgot for a few days it required seeking out that data online. It was also a question of what I should write down if I was traveling - back home or where I was? Originally I had this grand vision that I would be able to see what weather was doing over a long period of time, but after a while I wasn’t sure why I was doing it. It’s not like I can’t just find climate data (at least for now) and a good half of the year is the same entry over and over - 0 degrees F, snow/cold/cloudy. The fact that the book starts in the middle of winter makes meteorological data rather dull. In addition, there isn’t even much to write about the nature in my local neighborhood half the year (another idea I initially had) because once winter hits there are very few year-round residents of northern Minnesota that remain active (shout out to the chickadees that entertain my cats by playing in the leafless lilac bush on warm days in February). Basically, I had lost the ‘why’ for myself.
I feel like asking ‘why’ is a great way to approach life. In my previous professional life I taught environmental education and museum education, asking why is a huge part of that learning process. It’s curiosity and once we got past determining the difference between a random hypothetical and actual inquiry, students made such fun discoveries. I wasn’t having that feeling. So I went back to an old tried and true method that was hammered into me in elementary school. An axiom that most know in one form or another:
Who am I keeping this record for?
What do I want this notebook to do for me today/tomorrow/future?
When do I want to write? Morning, evening, once a week, biweekly, etc.?
Where should I be keeping this notebook so that I can remember to engage with it regularly?
Why do I care about keeping up with this notebook?
How do I accomplish what I want want and why I care?
When I was in the NPS we had a saying we would use whenever we were developing new education activities - remember the Mission. We aren’t just doing a nature walk, we’re engaging learners with aspects of the ecosystem and why it is important to preserve it. ‘Remember the Mission’ is something I bugged my most recent non-profit executive director endlessly about because no one in the organization could even rattle off the non-profits’ mission statement. It’s the end goal to know, what am I/we trying to accomplish. Basically, figure out what the preferred outcome is and then build a way to achieve that. It’s a method of focus that really helps ground me to why things are important. Even the ‘why’ of cleaning my kitchen can be found this way, I clean so my household doesn’t get food poisoning.
So, what to do to remember/find the why of my 5-year journal?
Who: I am writing this notebook for my future self.
What: I want this record to be a record of snapshots of my life, feelings, and accomplishments. I want to focus on notable events (big or small) and progress on my goals.
When: Still working on this one, but the plan will be reaching for the notebook daily, likely in the afternoon or evening.
Where: I will be keeping the notebook in the same spot on my desk so that I can visually see it when I sit down to do other writing or desk tasks.
Why: The big one. Already a year and a half into the journal and it’s interesting to see things unfolding. Even when I was desperately trying to keep the journal upbeat while I pondered changing careers, I can see the hard time that I was going through. It will be interesting to see where I am in another year now that I have made some big changes professionally and been doing a lot of self-work in order to actually go after things I care about.
How: I will do this by engaging with the notebook daily and not putting pressure on myself to write in it. I can reflect on the entry of the previous year(s) and if there’s nothing I want to record on the present day? I am allowed to collage or write quotes or otherwise fill the rectangle as I see fit. This is what I ultimately did while catching up. I opened my weekly planner and wrote on some days and played with washi and stickers on others. I found myself smiling and finding joy doing this - which is another important why when it comes to a hobby.
I started volunteering at my local aquarium this year because I missed chatting with folks about animals. The octopus was having a lot of fun in her tank. I bought myself a Fujifilm Instax printer for traveling, but haven’t used it much yet.
We’ll see if it lasts for the rest of the year and into 2026 (I still can’t believe we are almost done with June, this year has been a decade long and too short all at once), but I’m going to enjoy the journey.
And I’ll have my ‘why’ to get me back on track.
Another benefit to adding stickers/washi is that I can enjoy these pretty stickers for years to come!
Currently Inked
Diamine Tundra - Kaweco liliput copper M stub - I can’t remember if it was the Pen Addict Slack or the Atlas Stationers Discord, but I caught a conversation about inks folks are excited about to come out soon from the black edition of Inkvent. There seemed to be a lot of love for the grays that came out last year and I hadn’t tried them yet. I chose tundra because the ink swatch had this muddy gray quality to it and it looked like it would be a good shader. I am pleased to report that it is an excellent shader, especially in this nib. Stubs tend to bring out shading and give my writing personality. I really put it to the test while drafting this post while sitting on Park Point on the shore of Lake Superior. It got a little dry in the nib from the constant breeze off the water, but it only completely dried out once when I left it uncapped while pondering. A quick recap and a gentle shake got the ink moving again. I don’t know if I’ll ever get a full bottle of this since I have several gray inks in this tone range, but it’s worth a look if you don’t have a muddy brown gray in your collection.
Diamine Candle Light - Kaweco liliput fireblue M - I was really craving some yellow ink and I decided to pick out another Inkvent ink. Candle Light is a lovely warm yellow that does have some shading on certain papers. Like most Diamine inks it is really well-behaved. I’ll probably swap it for a blue on the next fill, but this is always a great, legible yellow to return to when I want some sunshine coming out of my pen.
Ferris Wheel Press Bearrington Black - Kaweco Ice Sport Red B - I just keep filling up this pen over and over again. Sometimes having a black ink ready to go just feels good. It’s no fuss and goes with everything. This black definitely hangs out in the very dark gray category which offers up a little shading (sensing a theme in my ink choices yet? lol). I might need to start a black ink exploration up again and do some direct comparisons…
Nothing like listening to Lake Superior talk through the mist and getting visited by gulls while drafting blog posts.